Erotic Pandemonia!


The Amorist and her colleagues set out their stall at the Art Car Boot Fair in Lambeth last weekend and sold magazines to the passing revellers. If you’ve never been, the idea of the Fair is that painters, sculptors and other creative types sell their works at bargain prices out of boots of various vehicles, or make special editions just for the occasion. The queue to meet and greet Sir Peter Blake and buy one of his jaunty prints of a Staffordshire terrier went right round the block. Another top sighting was the seven-foot performance artist Pandemonia, who designs her own tight latex whole-body suits for every occasion and is seen in the front row of all the smartest fashion shows. It was a hot day to be encased in rubber and when Pandemonia dropped by the Amorist’s stall she was glad her own peccadillos do not include the desire for a second, sweltering epidermis.


The magazine was loaned its very own stylish, pale blue vintage Vauxhall for the day and the Amorist’s deputy, Annie Blinkhorn, a lover of all things vintage, had to be prised off the bonnet from time to time, where she was sprawling like a model from a 1950s motorshow. Next door to the Amorist, the artist and illustrator Laura New (whose work features in the magazine) was doing a roaring trade in Gothic ink-works and glass bell-jars containing entwined, heavily-tattooed wooden artists’ mannequins. And just down from her was the Amorist’s second favourite magazine, The Idler, who were offering one-to-one philosophy sessions from the consultancy space of their motor. Inspired by the notion, Annie suggested the Amorist and her staff demonstrate their own intimate philosophy from the Vauxhall’s backseat – but then remembered she wasn’t living in a Carry On film. Although she was definitely channelling the young Barbara Windsor (and Sid James) that day.


The Amorist went off round the Fair scouting saucy artworks for the magazine. She’s always on the lookout for great erotic illustrators and the Art Fair is an excellent place to find them. She was particularly taken with Geraldine Swayne’s stand, with its fine array of lewd signet rings and has been daydreaming of commissioning a bespoke one ever since. She walked away with a catalogue of Swayne’s works, which contains some of the sexiest contemporary nudes she’s seen and a couple of depictions of spanking which made her think of Paul Rego’s darker work. Have a gander at her website on: http://geraldineswayne.org/ 


The Amorist also liked Wilma Johnson’s jewel-bright paintings of mermaids and naked nymphs and hopes to carry some in the magazine in the future. She noted (not for the first time) that women appear to be more interested in trying to convey erotic ecstasy and sexuality in art, whereas men often seem more tilted at a shock-jock angle. Although she’d be delighted if any of her male readers prove her wrong.

Let us give ourselves over to joy…to voluptuousness, as if this were our last night among the living.
Alfred de Musset